It Is What It Is

So, I left off with a rather smug letter to Marlin, a kind car salesman who has been in consistent contact with Luke about a 15 passenger van. Now that time has passed and the van honeymoon is over, well…

Let’s just say you don’t know what is coming down the road, pun intended. This vehicle is beautiful on the outside, but has required some major repairs on the inside. What a good object lesson for us in our own journeys through life. That outward appearance doesn’t charm us as much now that we’ve put so much money into it. But, it is what it is.

I wrote that phrase into an email to my dear friend, and got to thinking how simple, but good, this statement really is. I’m all for making goals, but sometimes in life it is more about being content in the place you are. I went to a ladies’ workshop at a church a few weeks ago, and the main takeaway for me was the truth from Acts that says, “God determined” people to live in the times and places He put them, so that they would seek Him. There are a lot of loose strings in my life right now, things I wish were different, or better, or at least DONE, tied up, so I could move on to a next thing. The popular “When my ship comes in, then…” brand of wishes are big in my brain. But the way this verse was shared that morning, it was like God saying, “I determined this, and this, and that, to all be up in the air right now, for some specific purposes of My own. I determined…even this.” So, all glory be to God, in the desert, in the wilderness, in the waiting. I want that to be my response more and more.

As I type this, Julia sleeps in the Ergo strapped to my belly (it is like she never left!), and the littles play Loaded Questions at my feet. Some of the kids are pre-readers and writers, and don’t know left from right, so just figuring out how to play is an entertaining listen. We are in Lynchburg for Liberty’s homecoming. Since Luke’s sister moved here and it is the second year we have visited along with his other siblings, it is becoming more of a family reunion/photo option than about Liberty. But many are at the football game right now, others out shopping, and that leaves me home babysitting the rest. I’m not really complaining; getting out with Julia in tow on a gusty 50 degree day is not desirable anyway. But it has been hard these last few months still having ones so young, but needing to interact with those who have teens, too. And, I don’t really fit in with either kind of moms. But, it is what it is.

This morning I was able to visit an old friend from Word of Life and Liberty days. I remember when I went on a College for a Weekend tour at Word of Life, Rebekah was the one that immediately approached me and took me under her wing. I couldn’t wait to get to school in January, because I knew way cool Rebekah was there waiting for me. We stayed friends through our time at Liberty, until she started dating a man that I didn’t like. This was completely my problem, her now-husband is a wonderful person. I was jealous, and didn’t have much tolerance for people who were different than me (99.999% of the population, I am coming to realize). He was there today, and so kind and outgoing to me, that I felt like asking his forgiveness on the spot for my stupidity back then. Jesus, and twenty years, can change a person, thankfully. Rebekah is well, living an inspiring and fruitful life in the mountains of Virginia 400 miles from me, but as we talked today, I realized that we both are having some of the same deep thoughts about life, and dealing with some of the same issues in home and family and spirituality. A good reminder that everyone everywhere has much in common with everyone else, though we are all different. And, I could conclude to my mother-in-law when I got back from my visit, Rebekah is one person I know who is a lot like me. Learning as we go. It is what it is.

We head home tomorrow, back to the daily school routine. I look forward to it in some ways, as Julia has been very erratic and offbeat in her napping and feeding while gone. But, these kinds of breaks are good for me, too, to provide times of reflection and examination of things going on in my life right now. It is what it is, and I want to make the best of it.